Not long ago, I learned that in addition to being gay I’m also autosexual. Here’s how Wikipedia describes autosexual: “Autosexuality is a valid sexual orientation where a person experiences sexual attraction primarily toward themselves. Autosexual individuals often find their own body and presence sexually arousing and may prefer solo pleasure or masturbation. It is distinct from narcissism and exists on a spectrum.” Google search adds: “This does not mean that someone who is autosexual is incapable of dating or forming romantic bonds with others.”
I had always thought that my sexual attraction to myself was just a part of being gay, but it turns out that this is actually a specific type of sexual preference, so I’m both gay and autosexual. It’s also possible to be heterosexual or bisexual along with being autosexual, or just autosexual by itself. As noted above, being autosexual has nothing to do with being a narcissist, which is a common misperception. Narcissists have a lack of empathy for others and a toxic need for external validation which is part of a personality disorder (as described by Google search), while being autosexual does not involve any of those unhealthy traits.
I made this silly collage (above) just for fun to express my autosexual side. The thing that I like best about being autosexual is the feeling of being happy to be me. I like spending time with myself, either when I'm out and about or just relaxing at home. Admittedly, I do spend a lot of time in front of the mirror, it’s one of my happy places. If you follow my posts on Quora you probably already came to that conclusion a long time ago! LOL The collage does totally make me look like I’m a narcissist though because it’s just a bunch of selfies, but I assure you that I’m not! LOL I'm not so full of myself that I think I'm better than anyone else, I wouldn't have a socially introverted personality if that was the case, but I just absolutely love each of these photos so I wanted to put them all together. Some people might think that I’m being pathetic or vain by posting this online, or that I’m over sharing, but I don’t think I’m so different from others in this regard.
I’m sharing this part of myself because I just want to be as genuinely the real me as possible. I’ve mentioned before on this blog and on Quora that I don’t want to hide anything about myself out of shame anymore. There’s no reason why any of us should be ashamed of our sexuality, whatever it might be, or how we feel about our bodies, or for wanting to be openly naked. We’re all aloud to be human and to be in tune with our own comfort zone and to express ourselves in this regard. So that’s all that I’m doing.
Plus I’m just having some sexy fun! ;)
Also, part of me just wanted to do something special in order to officially “come out” as autosexual, therefore a collage with some naked selfies seemed appropriate. LOL It feels good to understand this aspect of myself better. I’ve been enjoying my mirror self ever since my teens, so I’ve actually been autosexual my whole life and didn’t know it until now!
Loving yourself is a good thing, some people just take it further than others. I enjoy seeing and watching myself in the mirror, there’s no harm in that. It’s like the Billy Idol song, I’m dancing with myself. LOL It’s actually quite comforting and I don’t have to worry about what anyone else thinks, I can just do my own thing.
I guess I’m also posting this because I’m curious to know if there is an autosexual community out there, and if so how big the community might be. In any case, regardless if you are autosexual or not, always love yourself unconditionally because you are the only YOU there is!
- Mikey :)
